YBR-- The Milk, but not the Cow

Question…What’s up with men wanting all the aspects of a relationship without making it official? (Disclaimer: I am not referring to all men, just a substantial many. I realize that there are many good men out there that are ready for a relationship. I recognize and appreciate such men…Anyway). I’ve had a ton of experience with these shenanigans. You meet a guy, you date, you date for a while, things seem to be going well, but instead of actually becoming a couple they “don’t want to define things”. Or they “just want to keep things the way they are”. It all boils down to the fact that they don’t want to be in an actual relationship. However, they want you to be exclusive to them, they want you to act like their girlfriend and be there whenever they need you, they expect to get lovin on regular basis. They want you to take on all the responsibilities of a girlfriend…without the commitment. What kind of malarkey is that? I myself have been in this situation before and after a while you really start to wonder what the heck the problem is. If you applied for a job and were told…we want you to take on all these responsibilities, put forth your best effort in getting your work done on time, and always be available in case we need you…but by the way we don’t really want to give you a paycheck. Would you go for that? It’s like putting all your savings in a stock that promises no return on investment. And we all know relationships (whether you have a title or not) are huge investments of time and emotion. Am I making too big of a deal with this, should we just be willing to go with the flow? What’s the deal with the guys, why are they so averse to making it official?