Sexy Friends...The new double standard

Question… Why are men thrown off by women that just want to be sexy friends and nothing more? This question comes from one of my loyal readers and she brings up an interesting point. For a long time men have been ok with just being sexy friends with women (for clarification, a sexy friend is a person that you have great ‘no strings attached’ sex with #thatisall). In these sexy friend scenarios if the guy wanted to talk, or go out, or do other dating like things (in addition to the sex) they could call on their sexy friend and she’d usually oblige. Typically in these situations if the woman started to “catch feelings” the guy would quickly remind her that they are just sexy friends. Well it seems that these days more women are opting for the no strings options with men, but some men aren’t as good as handling being treated this way by women. Now from my very unofficial process of consensus building (i.e. talking to a few of my friends) for a woman there are a couple of rules to sexy friends and they are at follows 1) we are not real friends, we are simply two people that like having sex with each other. 2) talking (unless its related to the details of when/where/how the sex will talk place) isn’t really necessary. 3) both parties should wake up in their own beds…there is no need for any dating like behavior b/c that just makes things too sticky. 4) when the sexy friend situation has run its course let’s just move on, no need to discuss anything. However, when such rules are implemented by the women some men can be a bit taken aback by it. It can sometimes come as a shock that the woman has no interest in participating in any of that extra stuff, she just wants sex. So…Why is it okay for a man to get what he needs out of a sexy friendship, but it seems to be assumed that a woman will be open to more if the guy decides he wants it?

Can't let the lovin go...

Question… Have you ever mistaken a man with a really good penis for a really good man? This is an interesting phenomenon b/c there is a lot to be said about good loving. A number of situations bring me to writing about this particular topic. There have been plenty of women who have stayed with a guy a far too long simply b/c said man could put it down in the bedroom. I kinda get that, I think I tend to be more forgiving if my SO is putting it down right. Consistent exceptional loving tends to decrease ones “pettiness quotient" quite significantly. But is there a limit? Is there any penis good enough to make you put up with ridiculous shenanigans? I imagine there comes a point where no matter how good you’re getting done its not enough to get over being done wrong, right? Do guys go through the same thing? Do they stay with super crazy/unstable women just because she has really yummy and fun hot pocket?

Is he a cheat?

Question…is it true that a guy climaxes faster when he hasn’t had any in a while? I ask this question b/c a friend of mind had the following situation. Her and her guy hadn’t had sex in months (about 5) for a number of reasons. When they finally did have relations again she said it was great and long lasting. He tried out new tricks and everything. She felt that this was a sign that he had been with someone else during their hiatus. Now, I know plenty of guys claim that when they haven’t had any in a while the first time they get some they can release pretty quickly, but is this really true? Also does showing off new tricks indicate cheating? Just b/c they haven't had sex in months and when they finally did he was good with stamina doesn't mean he's a cheat right? Unfortunately, I can’t give this particular friend advice b/c I already think her man is cheating and probably has been for a while (but not for the reasons mentioned above). So since I can’t be objective I’ve decided to open it up for discussion. Should she be worried he’s been getting his loving elsewhere? Is it normal for a guy to climax quickly after they’ve been inactive for a while?